Frustration

July 22, 2015

You ever get to the point you have literally had enough with everything and want to throw your hands up. This was me last night, drama, drama constantly no satisfaction or relief to where you can move on with your life. You would think that after a few months of everything being done it would end, NO…

I feel like in a cage and I see the freedom but cannot escape to it. Stuck in a rut. It would really be nice to be able just to move on with my life and enjoy things that come with it but lately that isn’t it. Just feel like be completely left alone and let me be by myself for a while without any distractions so I can fulfill my destiny alone. Do you of you feel like this? Comment.

Just the other day had something else happen, you know I have help with the church and gotten things setup. You always have someone who what it all to and do anything to get it. Well they perused and got what they wanted so I removed myself from what I created. I will eventually step down on my part and let someone else handle it for a while. I can always find other things to do for a ministry. But, it is always something when you do the right thing or try to do the right thing.

Driving in this morning I could feel the rage inside and was thinking I need to get away alone. Just a time for me and nobody else to be there. It is nice to have people around but that isn’t always the answer. You need ME time. Just like me always want to help other because I do give of myself, but sometimes that isn’t the way of doing it. I do and do for other but I ask sometimes where is the ones I have help, why don’t they come and say help anything I can do for you. This infuriate me… then I hear you are doing the right thing. We to me sometimes the right thing isn’t right.

I am in I.T so I have people come up and ask me computer questions. Now doing this for a job sometimes you get tired of it, but they will ask I have a computer and blab, blab blab… and I have looked at them and want to say “don’t care”. The bad thing it’s at church more than anywhere else. I go to church to worship not work… then some will say you are doing good…

I am sorry for raging on but just a little frustrated to day and I am sure everyone else gets like I do to.. You know after the crap I been through over the last couple of years you tend to get an attitude. People on the outside have no idea what you go when things get bad. They can try and comfort you tell you things but all in all, they have no idea.

I know I crapped in this post, but maybe someone is going through the same as me… comment and go from there. We are human and we will get upset, but push on and you will get through.

RBTC